Tag Archives: Gandalf

Anyone got a Gaunt Family Ring? Anyone? … Anyone?

I need a resurrection of my dating life!

resurrection stone

I know what you’re thinking!

late

To which I can only naturally reply:

on time

I have been crazy busy the last two months. There’s been dating, and there’s been life, there’s been this:

castle

SO EXCITING!

And then there’s this:

hosp

Not so fun and exciting. In an effort to really be clear about some of my dating difficulties, I am going to do something that is very difficult for me: open up.

So I thank you, dear readers, for your patience with me. Once I get you all caught up, I’ll reward you with my best story yet… how I met this guy:

I met him for realsies!
I met him for realsies!

Must Haves

I’ve mentioned a few times the book Date or Soulmate? by Neil Clark Warren.

reading

I have done a study of this book in my Wednesday Night Singles group at church. Neil Clark Warren, the books author, is also the co-founder of e-harmony, another online dating service similar to match. Although the book’s material didn’t lead me to choose their website for my online dating service, I was still able to gather a lot of information from fully going through the material. I would recommend this book for anyone interested in dating. You are able to really decide what things you really need a partner to have and want things you must avoid in order to have a healthy relationship for you. It doesn’t need to only be used by people seeking a spouse- you can put these same filters for use, regardless. After putting in some serious thought, I came to several “light-bulb moments” on why some of my previous relationships didn’t work.

delum

The book covers the 50 most popular Must Haves, and advises that yours may not be on the list, but to add it to your list. As we’ll see in an upcoming post- one of my Can’t Stands was one I had to write!

Some examples of the top 50 are: Artistic, Organized, Conflict Resolver, Abstinent, Sexually Adventurous, etc.

For me, I had 22 of the top 50 checked in my book. those would be traits I would like to see in a partner. You are then asked to narrow that list to the top 10, and the top 5 (in the top 10). I will include the definition from the for the terms on the words I’ve chosen, for your reference, dear reader.

My top ten Must Have traits:

1) Sense of Humor- I must have someone who is sharp and can enjoy the humorous side of life.

laugh

2) Chemistry- I must feel deeply in love and attracted to my partner.

trust

3) Intellectual- I must have a partner who is bright and can share my understanding of the world as well as enjoy discussing important issues, like who’s the greater wizard Gandalf, or Dumbledor?

vs

4) Adaptable- I must have a partner who is able to adapt to life’s surprises.

5) Stepchildren- I must have someone who will accept my children as his or her own.

harry room

6) Staying In- I must have a partner who mainly enjoys staying in together and having some quiet evenings alone or with close friends.

7) Autonomy- I must have a partner who will give me space to be my own person.

eliz

8) Spirit of Volunteerism- I must have a partner who shares my willingness to volunteer and support community and/or social causes.

9) Family Life- I must have a partner who is committed to me, home and family. (The book actually says “marriage, home and family.” but I am not sure I want to be married again.)

10) Relaxed- I must have a partner who is able to forget about money and focus on the important parts of life.

family

I am looking forward to sharing my can’t stands with ¬†you in my next post, and I can’t wait!!! to tell you all about my first date! I did it- I ACTUALLY WENT ON A DATE!